Warming up my slappin’ hand.

Eric Bolling:
You did what?!
You’re serious.
You did this in earnest.
You picked on some of the most beloved puppets in the world, and you got a “positive” response from your viewers for that? Dude, whatever (eyeroll).
So, due to this “encouragement,” you felt emboldened enough to make a debate challenge.
to. a piece. of felt.

Psst. Yo, Bolling.
Come here.
What did I tell you about messing with the Muppets?
What did I tell you?!

*smack* What is wrong with you?
*smack* Are you a grown man or what?
*smack* Don’t you have any respect?!
You disrespected the Little Green Guy, who’s been in the business for over fifty years, you dolt!
Those pieces of fabric are more beloved than you will EVER know!!
*inhale* But you know what? I’m not going to get more worked up about this. I don’t need to.
Because Kermit can speak for himself. And so can Miss Piggy.

You just got served. By Bacon.

That’s right. You just got your sorry butt handed to you by a sock with lashes!! WHAT!

*Sigh* I hadn’t even had my coffee yet.