Archive for May 5, 2010

Double Tall Knucklehead Latte

Lady sues Starbucks for ‘unreasonably hot’ tea put in containers which were not safe. She wants pain and suffering pay.

Her lawyer declares that due to Starbucks’ negligence, she has suffered great physical pain and mental anguish.

Great physical pain and mental anguish.

My guess would be the mental anguish she’s suffering started long before she set walked in there.

Now, if I’m not mistaken, the precursor of “Please be careful. The contents of this cup are extremely hot” is printed on EACH and EVERY cup of tea and coffee they serve. With the optional cardboard sleeve, of course.

Now, the only way I can see this happening and her having a case is if she didn’t have the warning printed on just her cup
AND she ignored the sleeves next to the cups
AND she didn’t think to ask for another cup to insulate the heat and protect her hand even after touching it
AND she’s never set foot in a Starbucks or ordered anything hot in a cup ANYWHERE IN NEW YORK IN THE LAST 15 YEARS!
Yeah, welcome to Dumbass Valley, lady. Population: you.